17 years. It's hard to even wrap my brain around the amount of time that's passed since Tim died. It seems like only yesterday and a million years ago...all at once. One thing's for sure though...today, the pain seems more substantial than ever before. Maybe each year that passes, I feel like this. But there's something almost tangible about the pain this year. Maybe it's because I'm getting closer and closer to the realization of my dream. Perhaps that realization makes me even more sad at the fact that Tim's not here to cheer me on...or maybe he would have been playing guitar with me.
Though I sit here today "on my own," a reference to the song I sang in Tim's memory back in 8th grade when he died, I know I'm never really alone. I carry Tim's spirit with me as I travel on this journey. My journey is filled with countless people, places, lots of music, and not much sleep. God's equipped me to deal with all the hardships that come along with this adventure, which can be so hard at times. But aside from the joy that music brings me and the satisfaction of seeing my hard work produce results, I have Tim's memory and legacy to keep me going.