Smoking or Non?

Image by Leo Reynolds via Flickr

I quit smoking 4 months and 15 days ago...but who's counting? As a smoker, I always felt like an outcast, excusing myself to slip out and puff down a cigarette. On any given day, I could usually be found with lotion, gum, body spray, mints, etc. I was constantly trying to hide the fact that I was a smoker. Maybe hide is too strong of a word...I was at least trying to counteract some of the gross effects of smoking...quitting obviously would've been much more effective in this regard.

Now that I'm not a smoker, I feel like I'm on the other side of the spectrum...especially in New York City. Every corner I turn seems to be filled with groups of people living my former life, standing outside smoking cigarettes. Now that I don't smoke, it feels like everyone else does. Since I'm still relatively new in the world of non-smoking, I have moments when I don't mind standing in the midst of smokers...living vicariously through their second-hand smoke. But generally, I really dislike being anywhere in the vicinity of smokers, which is unfortunate since there's no real way to avoid it in the city. Luckily for me, NYC is making it harder and harder to smoke almost anywhere. Remember the days when you'd walk into a restaurant and the hostess would ask, "Smoking or Non?" I'm glad that I'm finally at a place in my life that I proudly proclaim "Non"...but walking around NYC is a lot like those ambiguous smoking and non-smoking sections in restaurants, where you're a victim of smoking whether you smoke or not.

It Ain't Easy Being Green

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Do you recycle? I'm not talking about separating your papers and plastics...I'm talking about dating exes. Depending on who you talk to, everyone seems to have a different answer for or against "going green." For me, I've generally been able to maintain friendships with most of my exes...though there are certainly some exceptions to this. After all, there was a reason you dated them in the first place so it seems that you should be able to maintain some level of friendship, right? On the other hand, there's a reason that they're your ex so maybe it's best to shut the door and move on. Friendship's one thing...but dating is a whole other situation. 

The dating scene is awful. I've been single more or less for about 3 years now and dating hasn't gotten any easier. In fact, it seems the longer I'm single, the easier it is to just stay that way. Of course I have my moments from time to time...like sitting on the subway across from a couple holding hands and making googly eyes at one another. But I usually get a reality check of some kind shortly thereafter...like overhearing someone in a fight over plans they made in lieu of spending every waking moment with their significant other. Ugh. 

A hectic schedule and barely enough time to sleep makes this kind of recycling seem so much easier. You don't have to get to know a whole new person from scratch. That sounds sad as I write it, but it really is true. Does recycling mean that you have to give up getting romanced though in place of something more convenient? I'm not even trying to pretend I have answers to these questions...just throwing them out into the universe and out of my head. Recycling might be good for the environment, but I'm not sure it translates the same in the context of people. 

I'll Sleep...when I'm dead

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If you can't tell by the title...I'm tired! This has been an incredibly hectic and busy week. I was fortunate enough to be cast to appear on Law & Order: SVU, a commercial for Mega Card (it's actually a Russian commercial), Running Wilde, and HBO's new feature film, Too Big to Fail, which is all about the financial collapse of 2008.

Aside from being tired though...I am so grateful and realize how blessed I truly am. Many of you who follow the blog are also personal friends...and Facebook friends, which means you've been updated pretty regularly about my latest adventures within the film/ television world. All of my latest adventures have included tremendously early mornings, endless subway commutes, long hours, lots of waiting....and I wouldn't change a thing! I am loving this new chapter in my life. I've met so many fantastic people and been a part of some wonderful productions. It makes me wonder why I waited so long to begin this journey. But even a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step...I'm so glad I finally took that step.

I have a relatively late call time tomorrow morning so I figured I would take an opportunity to reflect on what an amazing week this has been, express my gratitude to all of you who continue to show your love and support, and just relax. I hope that my small success story so far can help inspire you in whatever your aspire to be and do. Take that first step! LIVE while you're alive...you'll have plenty of time to sleep when you're dead.

When Ya Gotta Go, Ya Gotta...Hold It

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Not that I'm lacking any ideas for blog posts right now, but I just got home from my latest shoot downtown and I've got some ranting I want to do...for no other reason than it kinda blew my mind as it was happening...luckily it didn't blow my bladder.

I'm a coffee drinker...lattes to be more specific. The magic of coffee is that it seems to exit faster than it enters. Accordingly, I'm used to frequent trips to the ladies room after my latte...or two...or three.Today was a 2 latte kinda day. I got on the subway at Canal Street & 6th Avenue. If you're familiar with NYC, you know that I had a bit of a hike ahead of me back to the Bronx via train. I got on the A train and got off at 42nd Street. I figured since I was in Times Square, it would be a good place to make a pit stop and pay the consequences, so to speak, of my lattes. I made my way to the nearest restroom and it was locked. It was no big deal, I would take the shuttle to Grand Central and use the facility there.

I took the 7 train and walked through Grand Central to the next restroom. Locked. I walked over to a nearby  police officer who was standing on his trusty...his trusty ummm...I can't remember the name of the funny little stand-up bicycle-thing...I tried to google just those words, but nothing came up- man, Google is slippin. Haha. But I digress...when I aked him about the nearest open restroom, he said I'd have to leave through the turnstile to get to an open public restroom....which meant I would have to pay for another subway ride that I had already paid for. When I asked him why the restroom was locked during business hours, he just looked at me and said, "MTA." Ugh. I'm not cheap, but it was the principal that I objected to...so I made my way to the 5 train for my final transfer and home stretch of my journey.

I put my iPod on and tried to distract myself with slow music...I feared anything with an up-tempo might make matters worse. As I approached E.180th Street, I contemplated getting off just to use the restroom. It was the only subway station that I knew had one, but I figured it was probably locked, too...and I wasn't fully confident that listening to slow jams would save me if I had to wait for the next 5 train so I decided to stay on the train for the final two stops and take my chances.

As I tapped my feet frantically to the music during the last bit of my commute home, I contemplated if it would be a legitimate case against the MTA if I ended up with a UTI. As soon as I walked through my door, I ran to my bathroom...which was unlocked. Once my bladder was empty and my mind was more clear, I realized that it would be a ridiculous court case...it would obviously be much more logical to just blog about it. Lucky you.